Confessions of a Coffee Addict

I started drinking coffee when i was in college, whenever i study in the early morning hours I always have my mug with coffee in it. I would sit back, relax and smell the delicious sweet aroma of my beloved coffee, yes laugh all you want, but i was in love with coffee or let’s just say “ADDICTED” to it. I can’t be my normal self when I can’t have my coffee, okay let’s face it, I am cranky during morning (duh!) i am not a morning person, never was. I usually consumed 5 or 6 packets of coffee in a day, imagine me drinking that much caffeine which is never good for the body, at that time I was too stubborn to think about my health. I kept on with my coffee drinking until my father advise me to cut some slack on it, I never listened to him….

One day I was at work, I just finished drinking my 3rd mug of coffee, I can feel my heart rate speed up (it’s like my heart would jumped out from my ribs, lol) and I thought it’s okay, it’s just the caffeine. Later on, I had diarrhea (lol, I was at work and i kept going to the comfort room…grrrr!) and I thought it was the food I ate. Later in the evening, I had a headache, I thought maybe it’s my PMS (Premenstrual Syndrome) but again i’m wrong. The next morning, I found out some red bumps on my legs, I was really troubled now. I keep on thinking and trying to figure out my allergies for how many years what could have cause this, then it all came to me, it was the COFFEE. Because of my scars from the allergy, I never wear a skirt again, afraid to show my legs to a lot of people (ha! never! only a few can see it) and can never drink coffee T_T.

I ended my long term relationship with my beloved coffee last year, I miss coffee (waaaahhhh!). Whenever my officemates drink coffee, I go near their station, stand beside them and take a sniff of that sweet delicious smell… aaaahhhh! If only i can drink coffee again, I would savor the taste, treasure and love it….lol, laugh all you want but that’s the way I feel about COFFEE and as what Drew Sirtors said “Coffee is the best thing to douse the sunrise with.” I, the COFFEE ADDICT, can’t even take a sip of coffee while I have to watch people drinking and enjoying their coffee, this is ABSTINENCE, this is TORTURE but I have to do this for the sake of my health and what’s good for me. So here I am, living a healthy lifestyle making up of the things I’ve done and refrain from doing bad for my health.

I waited patiently
for you to recover,
I gave you time
to heal your wounds,
I lend you my ears
to unburden your sorrows,
I offered you laughter
to make you smile,
I hold your hand
to be your friend,
I am sorry that
my friend hurt you
If only I can ease your pain
and soothe your broken heart,
If only I can mend it
and put it back together
piece by piece.
I can’t say I know how you feel,
But I can feel your sadness
And know what you’ve been through.
Don’t worry, my dear
You’ll never get lonely,
I’ll be here beside you
to hold your hand,
give you my time,
lend you my ears,
offer you laughter,
and be your friend.
Smile with me,
cry with me,
share your thoughts,
your goals and dreams.
I’ll be here
beside you,
as your friend.

- Chubby

I see thine image through my tears tonight
By
Elizabeth Barrett Browning

I see thine image through my tears to-night,
And yet to-day I saw thee smiling. How
Refer the cause?–Beloved, is it thou
Or I, who makes me sad? The acolyte
Amid the chanted joy and thankful rite
May so fall flat, with pale insensate brow,
On the altar-stair. I hear thy voice and vow,
Perplexed, uncertain, since thou art out of sight,
As he, in his swooning ears, the choir’s amen.
Beloved, dost thou love? or did I see all
The glory as I dreamed, and fainted when
Too vehement light dilated my ideal,
For my soul’s eyes? Will that light come again,
As now these tears come–falling hot and real?

————————————————————–

I’ll be your sister and friend
By
Chubby

Past few days was like a whirlwind,
I tried to stay calm and grounded,
But in the end, I was left wounded,
By the aftermath of liking you too damn much,
I know now how you feel towards me,
The earlier, the better for me to unwind,
I am left with a shell of emptiness,
I thought I could believe myself in love again,
But again, I was wrong…
Don’t worry, I’ll stay beside you
I will still be your ’sister and friend’.

July 19, 2008 – I went to our office earlier than I expected, let’s just say i am excited to go to the office nowadays, *wink* if someone would ask me why i am early, i would say “figure it out” and smile mysteriously. I was updating my clients tasks minding my own business and totally focused on my work when “HD” suddenly IM me. My reaction? Surprise, hmm.. why IM me, he sent me a message that our BB’s would like to talk to us, one by one for 10 mins. Duh? I freeze up, I was scared to talk to the BB’s, I ask HD what topic are we going to talk, HD answered anything. I was figuring out what were the possible questions that will be thrown at me, when CY told me that she’s having palpitations and sweating palms by thinking about the one on one with the BB’s. I told her it’s okay, we can do this and reassure ourselves there will be no problem answering the BB’s questions. When it was my turn to go inside the conference room, HD introduced me to the BB’s while shaking hands with them. I sat down immediately on the chair that was offered but to my utter shame I halfway fell down on it. Luckily, I held on to the armchair to prevent myself from falling into the floor. The BB’s cracked a joke about the chair flying, and I laughed, I was thinking, if there is laughter the interview would be a piece of cake. The interview was okay, I survive. CY told me later that HD was laughing because of me, HD saw me falling halfway down the chair. Grrr…. how embarrassing, but later on I realized it’s okay it happened to me since I made him laugh, i love to see him smile since for the past few days I rarely saw him smiling. *aaawwww* how sweet! char! hahahah…. After we had our 1 on 1 interviews we took pictures… yehey! I got 1 picture together with HD, hahahaha (naka dare gud ko). After the BB’s left together with HD, we took pictures again, i laughed so hard because everybody was running everywhere to have their pictures taken. What a night, people were in high spirits and everybody were laughing. I love hearing and seeing them laugh, it makes my day a special one. I can’t wait for the pictures to be posted, I would definitely be expecting it.

July 17, 2008 – Yehey! Friday is fast approaching, i can’t hardly wait to get back to my NORMAL self! It’s been awhile i’ve crack some jokes, tease my officemates to death and laugh. I’ve been pretty serious for the last few days, been busy with my client’s tasks (grrr… ) and I never had the chance to open my mouth, what i mean is to talk with my officemates and swap stories with them. To add up with my worries, the BB’s of our company was visiting the premises and we were asked to dress up (smart casual), boohoohoo!!! T_T Tell the truth, I hate dressing up and looking pretty (just kidding!), just to let you know readers, I like to be comfortable with what I wear. I find it amusing when the BB’s comes to the office, there’s complete SILENCE and I was asking myself “Can I last for 1 week to keep my mouth shut?” I hope I can, lol. To keep me SANE for the past few days and NOT going CRAZY of total SILENCE was “HD”, just by catching a glimpse of him, I can reassure myself, I can DO this! If he can hear my thoughts, maybe he will definitely advice me to go to the looney bin!!! lol. I do have some crazy thoughts like doing “Ice Breakers” and singing “My toes, my knees… ” with BB’s shocking faces just for the heck of it, call me crazy but that’s the way I am. OMG, it almost 6 in the morning, this is not good, have to sleep now… lol, well I just have to think of “Happy Thoughts“, one more day to go!

June 15, 2008

Today, I arrived late to our Team Meeting at Vanilla Networks, though 3 persons were not there, still the agenda of the meeting push through. We discuss about the company’s policy, attendance, dress code, and etc. After the meeting, we all went to Metro, Ayala to pass the time and took a break at Metro Cafe to chat and relax for awhile. The group decided to have an early dinner at Neo-Neo near Carmelite Monastery. We proceed at Gimik, Mango to sing karaoke and have fun. Sai, Marih, Niño, Rexy and Gail joined us late, enjoyed the company and had fun. I sang a few songs and danced, my stomach was hurting too much for laughing out loud because of my friends antics and jokes (especially Sky, Sen and Jecy). What an amazing night, just clean fun and singing all night and to let you know we took a lot of pictures (be it stolen shot or not). We all went home at 10:15 because some of us have to be on duty tomorrow morning. I went home satisfied and sated.

June 14, 2008

I had dinner with my Sykes Friends at Padi’s Grill (i’m not sure of the spelling). Trish and I met at Jollibee, A.S. Fortuna and then went to Padi’s Grill, I was surprised to see a lot of new faces on Al’s Team, it’s been a long time I keep in contact with them. I don’t know how many years, it has been, but the person I keep in touch mostly were Trish, Malot and Liz. Of course, I keep myself updated with the news but it’s totally different when you are with them. Trish told me about Jerol and Ria, that they are going home to their respective hometowns, she also told me Beth is almost near her term and she (i’m referring to Trish) is also 5 months pregnant (yes, guilty as charge, Trish is the news updater or shall I say the informer of the news). The gathering was a close group, had dinner, swapped stories and jokes. Weng and Ran took a lot of pictures also, and I was like ok pictures, I should be on them, hahaha…join the fun. After dinner, went Karaoke, and people take turns getting on the stage to sing. I was thinking “OMG”, I can’t do that, I have a case of stage fright, yes guilty! I do have that, it’s okay for me if I sing with just close friends, but with people I don’t know, waaahhh! My knees would turn to jelly, butterflies on my stomach and hands sweating… (shucks!). After that, we went to Gimik, Mango Avenue but unfortunately they were fully book at the moment. So what we did, we went to this place which I don’t know where it was located (I forgot the name of the place also), we just gathered around the table and chat for awhile. I went home late and arrived at home around 1:00 in the morning. I had fun, enjoyed their company but apparently my body is not used to late evenings anymore (sign of old-age, hahahaha). So, I would like to give my gratitude to Al and everybody for having me at their Team Social Dinner, you have welcome and made me one of the Team. Thanks for everything.

Jun 14, ‘08 4:18 AM

For the past few weeks since I was assigned to be a VA, I haven’t got the time to check my emails, read a bestseller novel, watch a movie and play gaia (sob!). Well, today I’m fortunate to have an extra time to do all those things, yahoo!!! Can somebody tell me: Get a LIFE!!! hahahaha…. anyway, i’m still adjusting as a VA, eventually i get that hang of it (i hope so!). Here i am, writing a blog entry at 4:00 in the morning, this is crazy! I’m the only one here who is still awake (insomnia attack!!!) while my sisters are sleeping soundly in their beds. I wish I can drink coffee, but unfortunately I can’t since I just found out I am allergic to it (darn, coffee!!!), but I would just love to take a sip of coffee and I can’t forget the aroma of a mouth-watering… (ok! snap out of it!). My schedule this weekend is full-book for meetings, today I’m going to meet my Sykes friends and tomorrow I’ll be attending a Team meeting at Vanilla Networks. I hope I won’t be too tired to meet all these people, wish me luck!

A friend of mine, recommend me to this site www.wordpress.com, since I was intrigued to what it is, I signed up an account and here I am! I don’t usually share my thoughts and ideas to other people but my friend encouraged me to write-up about my ideas, opinions, poems, reviews and anything out of the blue that comes to my mind. I am still awake and it’s 2:36 in the morning, I can’t sleep and still writing reviews on the suspense/thriller novels I’ve read the last two weeks. My sisters are sleeping soundly and I am here sitting, facing our computer, writing… well, I’m going to make a try on writing stuff, I hope can do it!